Tuesday, October 23, 2012

Try It Again

I have another surgery scheduled for November 2nd. I met with my oncologist today and the test on my tumor (oncotype) came back with a high likelihood of recurrence. Surgery on the 2nd is to take the additional sample of skin and muscle for the biopsy and also to place a port. Once that is done we will wait 3 weeks before the start of chemo. I need 8 treatments, 2 weeks apart. The first 4 doses are a combination of 2 drugs, the last 4 rounds consists of just one drug. The way I have figured it out, I should be done with chemo by the end of March. The doctor said I can continue to work and ride through out my chemo but I will definitely be tired.

We will have to postpone my reconstruction until I finish with chemo. I had my first expansion appointment yesterday and it wasn't bad at all. They fill it with 50mL of saline once a week. It's really strange because almost my whole breast area is numb. They gave me lidocaine before they poked me with the saline but I honestly couldn't even feel the lidocaine much less the 50mL they put in. How weird is that? My muscle does feel a bit sore today but nothing bad.

Tonight I went up to the barn and got to watch Tarra ride Chevy. I brought him in and got him mostly ready for her to ride. I think he was happy to see me. We were joking that he is going to need therapy when this is all over since he keeps getting handed around. I had only had him for 2 months before my surgery, so we were just getting in to a routine. I feel bad that he is getting shuffled around. He was really good tonight and I can see some definite improvement in his trot/canter transitions.

I've had to remind myself today of some of the positives in all of this.

  • That this is happening in the fall/winter months. I feel like I would be sad missing out on so much summer fun. 
  • I have health insurance which goes right along with my job and wonderful co-workers who have been so supportive of me. 
  • I'm thankful that I have already been considering cutting my hair...now I can get rid of all of my split ends! I've also heard that sometimes your hair comes back in different, like curly, or something fun like that. 
  • I have a wonderful team of doctors taking care of me.
  • I only need 8 chemo treatments, it could be worse. 
  • I have excellent friends who are riding Chevy for me while I'm out of commission. 
  • And finally I have wonderful family support. 
I'm sure there are SO many more things that I should add but I'm tired and can't think straight anymore. :) 


  1. Noooo! :-( I am so sorry to hear this. You definitely have a great list of positives, but I was hoping to hear you were all clear and back to riding your boy. I think it will be good for him to be ridden by different people, in the meantime, especially since Tarra sounds like an awesome rider herself and you know he's in good hands. Hang in there and keep us posted!

  2. :( Not the good news we were hoping for. Hang in there!! It really is good timing (if there is such a thing). Someone else can be mucking in the dead of winter and they won't even hold a grudge. Hugs to you and best wishes going forward.

  3. I second SB - no mucking out can go on your list of pros!!

  4. You're such an inspiration being able to look to the positives. Good luck with the treatments. My good friend went through several treatments with chemo and rode for most of it (she's in her 70s so it's a little different) but her doctor encouraged her to ride as much as she could, taking into consideration that she'd be MUCH more tired than usual. I think when things were particularly tough she did some lunge lessons just to work on other parts of her body!


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